As I contemplate putting my thoughts to paper, I have avoided sitting at my desk all morning, my stomach is churning, and I am nervous about telling you about myself as a little girl who was mentally abused. I thought I had processed my childhood, forgiven the people involved, and moved on. Yet, it still hurt.
At times, it’s tough being a kid. It is such a short time in our lives, yet the memories can haunt us for a lifetime. But they don’t need to. While creating my book trailer (follow the link) I needed to find a photo that reflected the unrealistic expectations imposed upon me as a child. I found a photo, buried in a dusty box, one I did not recall ever seeing, and it opened a wound I thought had healed. The photo shows me after I fell, with a bandaid on my leg, crying, angry and confused.
Looking at the photo, I felt what my little girl (me) must have been feeling and I asked my adult self:
- If I am hurt, why is my mother not holding and comforting me?
- Why did mom feel she needed to record this incident on film?
- And most hurtful of all, why did she put a sarcastic comment on the back of the photo?
- And then I realized, Mom did the best she could and her lack of caring empowered me to look for my strength and be empowered
- It was all in the divine plan, I set it up!
I found the photo a few weeks ago. At first, it was upsetting to look at, but the impact did not hit me until two weeks later. On Easter Sunday the thought of not being with my family began my sadness but as I looked deeper I felt an intensity coming from my inner child.
- I began to sob.
- I walked into the bathroom to put a cold cloth on my face.
- I looked into the mirror and I was shocked!
- I had the same expression and the same lines on my face, that I saw in the photo of me as a little girl.
- My younger self was showing up to be empowered and loved, by ME!
I had to find a way to clear the pain:
I tried self-hypnosis
I called upon The Unseen Therapist
They all worked somewhat
Then I cleared my timeline and the pain began to subside
The process to clear your timeline and bring your inner child back into your heart can be found in my books:
on page 101 in Inner Gifts Uncovered, Life Tool: Self-healing for Issues in the Past, and on page 72 in Claiming Your Inner Gifts, Life Tool: Inner Child Healing and page 220 in They Did the Best They Could, Clearing Abusive Memories.
After following my own guidance
I found as I went to sleep I could feel my younger selves with me. They filled my heart, I covered them with love and I began to feel like myself as the divine spirit that I am, have always been, and will never diminish. We can move beyond our pain. Let my guidance reacquaint you with your divine essence.
Healing Codes and How to Use Them
- 11 96 888 for low self-esteem to create a healthy self-image
- 45 892 456 7478 69925 clears negative emotions
- 12 215 987 6412 releases excess energy
- 58 963 8114 to soothe an aching heart
- 66 82 121 for anger
- 76 33 121 for problematic thoughts
- 33 45 10101 for forgiveness
Learning Reiki is not only for practitioners. It’s for YOU
Reiki increases your psychic abilities, it empowers you to see a new perspective so you are not a victim to circumstances. Become balanced, empowered, intuitive, and wise. Let Marnie mentor you.
Reiki Mentoring videos are where you can learn from the comfort of your home. Marnie will personally answer your questions via email.
Search the level of Reiki you desire in the store.
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They Did the Best They Could, Discovering Your Path to Compassion See inside the book
Who do you know who feels mistreated by their family? You perhaps? They Did the Best They Could provides the tools to release that pain. Join Marnie in her spiritual journey as she searches for her father who left her before she was born. Her family memoir reveals lies, unrealistic expectations, and synchronicity’s too bizarre to make up. And yet it all ends with love. As the mysteries unfold, numerous synchronicities are revealed. The compelling tales are at times sad, sometimes shocking, but always written with wit and compassion. See how Marnie and her family coped and rose above the challenging issues that are familiar to many. What happens when a child is abandoned, and how does one overcome that obstacle. Abandonment comes in many forms, for one can feel deserted even when someone is physically present. Learn how to release resentment and begin to understand life’s struggles more compassionately.
The last half of the book is filled with Marnie’s wisdom from decades of counseling, providing insights, meditations, and practical step-by-step guidance that shows how to release heartache, anger, blame, and resentment. Learn to illuminate the hidden corners of your past and gain knowledge to perceive distressing situations in a new light, thus releasing pain and acquiring self-love.